How Do You Reignite the Romance in Your Marriage?

What do you do when your marriage has gone sour? How do you rekindle that first love?   You do what Jesus told the church at Ephesus when the church had lost its first love.   Revelation 2:4-5 “You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen? Repent and do the things you did at first.”  This says three things:  remember, repent, do.”   The same three things apply to marriage. First you remember the good times. You relive the experiences, the happy feelings when you first fell in love.   Then you Repent. This means to deliberately change your attitude towards your mate.  You choose to turn it around. You choose to act in a loving way. You choose to act in a romantic way even if you don’t feel romantic.   Then it says to Do the things you did at first. Act the same way towards your mate that you used to. What you did to fall in love, you must continue to do to stay in love. And if you act romantic you will begin to feel romantic. Not vice versa. You act your way into a feeling you don’t feel your way into an action.   When you first fell in love you did five things. So do them again.

  1. Focus on them, give them prominence or make them the priority.
  1. Encourage them, give them approval or recognize their good qualities.

1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NLT)  “So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.”

  1. Give them affection. And not only that which leads to the bedroom. Who cares if you weren’t raised that way? Change anyway.
  1. Give them some fun. Don’t be so boring. Be adventurous with your spouse.

And finally… 

  1. Make an effort to live in spiritual oneness by putting Christ first place in both of your lives. And begin praying for one another, together.

If you’ll do those five things, the romance will come back. By the way, is Christ first place in your life? Have you asked him to forgive you? Do you have your trust in Christ for your salvation?  Because that should be your first step. Get your life right with God first then the spark will be on the way.